- I’m gonna need you to wire that $2 billion to Caymans Acct #46-54a. Sorry. I meant #46-54c. The first two are overly funded. Let me know when it goes through. Any word back from Petraeus and Cantor?
- Shhh. I think this line is tapped.
- Duh. That’s why I’m using our secret lemon-ink code. Light a match and hold it up to your screen, silly. “$2 billion” = $2
- Oops. I was using the decoder ring. That explains it.
- Caymans = Underwater Mortgages.
- And Mortgages=CDO hedge fund leverage babies. Got it.
- Junkets. Doin’ it. State secrets.
- I think you mean Dunkin’ Donuts. Eatin’ it. Secret sauce.
Classified. Classified. Classified. Classy-fied.
- Uh oh. An FBI ‘agent’ just showed up here. His uniform is So skimpy!
- Agent Skankshorts
- That’s “MISTER Agent Skankshorts” to you, bub.
- I’ve never met him. Only did a dead drop that one time in Benghazi.
When did Eric Cantor officially know about our texts?
- I dunno. I only heard about them from him on the Wednesday before the election.
- We had a good laugh! “Nobody tell Feinstein!” hahahahaha! Eric is such a kidder. Kidder=sexy troll.
- For a cantor, he sure doesn’t sing very well.
- Only in the shower.
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