Him -> Me
undisclosed locations
  • I’m gonna need you to wire that $2 billion to Caymans Acct #46-54a. Sorry. I meant #46-54c. The first two are overly funded. Let me know when it goes through. Any word back from Petraeus and Cantor?
  • Shhh. I think this line is tapped.
  • Duh. That’s why I’m using our secret lemon-ink code. Light a match and hold it up to your screen, silly. “$2 billion” = $2
  • Oops. I was using the decoder ring. That explains it.
  • Caymans = Underwater Mortgages.
  • And Mortgages=CDO hedge fund leverage babies. Got it.
  • Junkets. Doin’ it. State secrets.
  • I think you mean Dunkin’ Donuts. Eatin’ it. Secret sauce.
    Classified. Classified. Classified. Classy-fied.
  • Greasy/fried
  • Uh oh. An FBI ‘agent’ just showed up here. His uniform is So skimpy!
  • Agent Skankshorts
  • That’s “MISTER Agent Skankshorts” to you, bub.
  • I’ve never met him. Only did a dead drop that one time in Benghazi.
    (Benghazi=Burger King)
    When did Eric Cantor officially know about our texts?
  • I dunno. I only heard about them from him on the Wednesday before the election.
  • Whoa.
  • We had a good laugh! “Nobody tell Feinstein!” hahahahaha! Eric is such a kidder. Kidder=sexy troll.
  • For a cantor, he sure doesn’t sing very well.
  • Only in the shower.
    (awkward silence)

You are here. But you could be here or here. I mean, if you aren't too busy.